break up

3 Things I learned When Mariah asked for an Inconvenience Fee

lessoned learned from Mariah Carey

Say what you will about Ms. Mariah she is a true diva and not just in the vocal aspect. Mariah has managed to do what women probably should have been doing all along. Demand money for wasting her time! After all time is super sacred because we can NEVER get it back.  Now I am not sure she will get the money. I am not even sure she deserves it. What I am sure of is this is one the most epic empowerment moves I have seen in a while.

Is it a publicity stunt for her upcoming show? Maybe. Does she deserve the money? Hell I don’t know because I wasn’t there. What I do know is it takes balls to do something this bold. She is in essence saying you waste my time so pay me. She uprooted her family to be with this man, and the demise of the relationship had her so distraught she had to cancel part of her tour. Before you condemn her she is a women first and a celebrity second.

She is not the first woman to move to a city to be with or closer to a man. If I am being honest, I have done it. It all worked out because I met my husband but I will never forget facing the fact that I left home and comfort with my daughter for a man and the relationship failed. She also is not the first women to be so distraught about love ending she had to miss work. Don’t pretend you have spent a day on the couch after a break up. Sure it is not the same as cancelling a tour but it boils down to a woman missing work because things did not work out with the man she loves. I think we often expect celebrities to bounce quicker, but why? They are human too.

Still not convinced this was an empowering move? Let’s talk. Remember the guy you cosigned for his car because his credit was bad and you believed in him? Remember when he stopped making those payments?  Or the guy who told you all his big dreams and you helped him by allowing him to live with you rent free and as soon as he got it together he only wanted to be “friends” so he could focus on his dream? Or the guy who slept with your friend? What about ole boy who lied and had a whole family turning you unknowingly into the Sidechick? Then there was the guy who promised he was different and told you he would love you forever and forever ended way sooner than you thought it would? See we have all been in some sort of situation where our time was wasted by a man we were in a romantic relationship with. So even if she doesn’t get the money in some way it has to feel great to be audacious enough to ask.

While I have had my own thoughts on Mariah since she got in the tub at the end of her episode of Cribs show she has made a serious move with this one.  She understands it does not matter what we think about her, her spending habits, her love life, and even her talent. She values herself enough to ask for what she believes she deserves. Now whether you think she is a hot mess for doing so or not here are three things to take from this situation.

Value yourself. For better or worse Mariah is asking for an inconvenience fee because she feel her time, love and location are valuable. If more of us saw the value in ourselves we not be swept away by men who are only going to waste our time by breaking promises they never intended to keep. While I am not telling you to charge your ex a fee I am saying understand what you bring to the table so you don’t have to settle.

Stop husband-ing (like wife-ing) these boyfriends. I will admit I have done it to. However the sooner you learn to stop the better you will be. We as women are trying so hard to prove we are wife material, (whatever that is because it is clearly different for every guy) that we forget we are the prize. Sure be down, have his back but things like moving, placing him on your insurance, combining bills these are all husband status activities. Any man married or not can leave but I promise you will feel so much better about yourself when you are going through the break up if you reserved some of the extras.  I know what you are thinking, well he was her fiancé. SO WHAT!!! He was not her husband and now she has to relocate again and start over. Some would say a fiancé is just a slightly upgraded boyfriend anyway.

Never be afraid to ask for what you want… after all you just might get it. We are living in strange times and it is oddly possibly that she just might get this man’s money. Even still what if she doesn’t get all of it but half?  Half will still add to her account. Without asking we can all agree she would get nothing.

I understand husband’s leave their wives all the time but not as often as boyfriends, and apparently fiancés. So protect your heart ladies, and be careful. Along with that never be afraid to demand your worth. You just might get it. When is the last time you boldly asked for what you wanted?