3 Lessons we can learn from Keisha

rudy

By now we have all heard about Keisha Pulliam and Ed Hartwell. If not, he has filed for a divorce and is asking for a paternity test. She says she has never cheated, but he has. He says she was more interested in having a baby than anything else. No matter what the truth is the situation is a very sad. I personally feel bad for her. Being pregnant is not easy, but to be pregnant, asked for a paternity test, and going through a divorce must be extremely stressful to say the least.

As a woman I am tired of other women dragging her. She messed up. She got married “too soon”. But what is too soon? My parents met and were married within six months, and they just celebrated 35 years together. So I am also not here for the time argument. It is so easy to look at her life, call her desperate, talk about how she should have known better, and what she could have done differently. When none of us are in her shoes. We have no idea what that man told her and we are not privy to her thought processes. In short we were not in the relationship so we should not be so quick to judge the relationship.

Lest we forget that we all have made some wrong choices when it comes to relationships and men. She just happens to be a celebrity. Please stop acting like you yourself or your close girlfriend has not been in this situation or something similar.  We have made impulsive decisions, and been in relationships that no one approved of.

It is not our place to look at her and judge when it could have been any of us. Hell it has been some of us. Everyone will say what Keisha did wrong, and how she messed up. I want to focus on what she did right. I know you gave me major side eye but keep reading.

She followed her heart. For whatever reason she decided to say yes. When she said yes she did that for her. No matter what anyone else thought and that is very freeing. Too many times we don’t do things because we lack support, or because we fear what someone will say. She stood in her truth at the time and went for what felt right to her. No matter how it ended her courage has to be applauded.

She decided to speak about it ONCE! In her interview that I am sure as gone viral she said she will only be speaking about it once and she is moving on. It is so hard to get over things when we have to keep reliving it. Something bad happened, and you have to keep repeating the story, or it keeps playing over in your head is like re opening the wound. Remember when your mom would tell you to keep your band aide on so the cut would heal? Same concept. She has decided to not to keep reliving and repeating the story because she is moving forward. Too many times we want to wallow in the pain when that is so counterproductive.

She seems to be keeping the focus on her baby. In the clip I watched she kept referring to her baby and how her baby deserves better. At this time, her marriage is over. Focusing on the unborn child is the best thing to do. She has to get herself together and prepare to be a mother. If what Ed said is true then she has what she really wants any way right? While her situation is not ideal she is in a much better situation than I was when I was a single mom.  Babies are miracles no matter how they were conceived.

I know it is so easy to pass judgement but remember she is human too. What are your thoughts on this situation?